WHY DO I THINK I CAN DO THESE THINGS?!

I like to think that I can attempt everything, but sometimes it's a definite reality check for me. We signed the kids up for swim lessons and their first lesson was today. So I got Sam and Mason ready in their suits and loaded all 3 in the car. We got there and they were bouncing off the wall excited to get started. I thought it would be a good thing to sign them up and have their lessons be at the same time. Good and Bad. Trying to get both of their shoes and clothes off and get them into the pool . . . . tricky. Samantha was awesome, I didn't even need to really be over there watching. She loved it and paid such great attention to her teacher (she told me her teacher looks like aunt Hilary). I tried to watch her as much as I could, but let's face it, Mason and Luella had my full attention. Oh yea, I've been holding Luella in my pregnant arms this whole time. Mason was not paying attention or doing what his teacher said as much as he should have been. He mainly just wanted to play around. I had to kinda yell at him (it was really loud in there with all the fountains), and ask and re ask him to pay attention. But he did it. So then, after their lessons were over, it was tricky to get both of the kids dried off, get their shoes on and get them on their way to the car, with Lu in my arms. Oh and Sam had a major melt down while we were leaving because she didn't want to carry her sandles. So when I finally convinced her to just put her shoes on, and I grabbed the towels with Luella in my arms, have I already mentioned that? I had about had it. Being 4 weeks away from having this baby, carrying Luella on my fat hip, and trying to do something nice for the kids by taking them to swim lessons might have been more than I can handle right now. I'm not complaining, but I am. It's just that if I weren't pregnant, or didn't have Luella attached to my hip it would have been a lot easier. So I texted Ben and let him know that as of now until the end of swim lessons he needs to be off early enough so that he can come and help me with the kids, or I could just hire a sitter 3 times a week. Either way, I really want this to be fun for Sam and Mason, and as much as I would like to be super mom, I just can't.

I'm just trying to figure out how in the world I am going to take care of 4 precious kids and still be a sain mommy. Not to mention that I have 2 toddlers and 1 baby already, and adding 1 more baby. This is going to be a real trick, but I am trying to figure out some solutions to make things run better and help everyone be happier. Because it is true, a happy mom is a happy home!

(I hope this didn't sound like a bunch of complaining. I love being a mom, and this is the road I chose and I wouldn't ever trade it, just lots of craziness going on right now and talking myself through it.)